Bittersweet beginnings

A few years ago I decided to break my silence. I didn’t know what I was walking into. I just knew when I told friends in private, it did not result in safe situations. My options were to continue to ignore the darkness, embrace more darkness or expose all of the darkness in public. TheContinue reading “Bittersweet beginnings”

Art of Receiving. Art of Reciprocity.

I’m constantly surrounded by love. I know this in the deepest part of my soul. My heart is sometimes overwhelmed with pain. My head gets distracted with trying to quantify things. But my soul knows. It always knows. When my grandfather transitioned, I felt a part of my heart go with him. I felt veryContinue reading “Art of Receiving. Art of Reciprocity.”

Whats love got to do with it?

The Universe has been super chatty lately. Or I’ve successfully quieted my internal world to hear the messages. Perhaps, I should give myself more credit go with the latter… I’m in a safe place and surrounded by love. Sometimes others are offering love and sometimes, I’m just love bombing myself. That’s my current vibe forContinue reading “Whats love got to do with it?”

Recalibrate and DEFINE a new normal.

*I’ve been writing whilst off-grid. Amature move is putting the words in an email rather than a word document. Autosave apparently didn’t work. It’s a shame as I had some pretty good flows. Keeping tabs on my emotional processing as I move through this road trip has been a priority. The Universe obviously wants toContinue reading “Recalibrate and DEFINE a new normal.”

Embracing Cyber Stalking & Unhealthy People

In the context of domestic violence. This tugs on my heartstring (covert abuse). Especially after accepting another truth last night. Last night, I realized I had 12 visitors and 438 views on my blog. I’m a big data person. This is an indicator that my family is bored. They are looking for information to stirContinue reading “Embracing Cyber Stalking & Unhealthy People”

“Home” is a state of Being

Traditionally, my home has been my sanctuary. It’s a place for me to be me. Not who society wants me to be. Not who my family expects me to be. But a place for me to unapologetically be me. A place where I can buy $50 of red grapes, $100 of soft cheese and theContinue reading ““Home” is a state of Being”

People we lose to suicide

My dearest Gumby, It’s been a number of years since you graduated from a friend to a guardian angel. I cherish my conversations with the clouds and appreciate when you reveal your presence. You have always been able to understand my feelings when I couldn’t find the words. You also knew how important it wasContinue reading “People we lose to suicide”

It’s time to stop running & start planting roots

I’ve been thinking of ways to acknowledge this season of healing and celebrate my existence. This tattoo symbolises so many things… the pictures capture just about every single emotion possible… I love my bio family with something fierce. My love will never fade. I’m OK that they do not love me in a way that IContinue reading “It’s time to stop running & start planting roots”

Broken vs Evil… is there a difference?

I started this entry on August 31. A few days after I left ‘home’. My mother was having open heart surgery, meaning I had to deal with the most manipulative person in the entire world (her son). Her son had distorted her reality to a point where she was already a shell. When she’s notContinue reading “Broken vs Evil… is there a difference?”

My higher self is my best friend

I’m not even going to pretend. Most of my life is in autopilot. This has served me well because I cannot remember the last time that I was in normal situations. When greeted with dysfunction, I tighten my ponytail, smile, and navigate the sea like a 70+-year-old sailor. It’s NOT my first rodeo and IContinue reading “My higher self is my best friend”