I am all over the place in terms of growth. It feels like everything is in overdrive. The more I stay detached to all external ‘things’, the more ‘ah-ha’ moments that seem to present themselves…
I just completed a week with some of the most energetic people I’ve EVER met! If endorphins could be bottled, this is ground zero of AWESOME! Each person comes from a different background, family, religion etc etc etc but ALL share a love for health. A love for movement. A love for living their best life.
One of the most difficult truths I’ve had to embrace is that sometimes I’m able to inspire others to live their best life and sometimes, I’m simply not. Semi often, I receive messages from others thanking me for inspiring them. Complimenting my focus (mindset) to accomplish a goal. Or simply sharing some overwhelming energy with them that served as a catalyst to simplify and expand. Simplify and expand.
My current focus is on launching my group fitness instructor hustle. I secured the licenses. Nailed the audition. Built the network. In a few days, it’s go-time. I’m a ball of nerves and still getting all the butterflies to fly together. The phenomenal thing about butterflies is that once I’m in a place of quiet, I’m able to feel the butterflies as an indicator that I really care about something. There is always a chance of failure but to me, any true failure is not showing up. I showed up. I will continue to show up. Convention has taught me so many things and the biggest take-a-away for this exact moment is: it’s not about getting it perfect, it’s about how you recover.
I’m a goofball. I laugh through most confusion. I get my sassypants on when surrounded by mixed energy. I’m intense AF when I’m building. There is always a time for jokes and then there is time to simply put.in.the.work. I’m in a season of putting in the work.
This is also the first time that I feel that I’m actually meant to be in Chicago. For the last few months, there were so many signs to just leave. Abort my mission and start someplace else. Accept that the work was finished and time to move on. And just like that, when I was about to accept ‘defeat’, the Universe starts opening up. Why?! Because I kept showing up.
Chicago was getting overwhelming. Pause. Identify where I stepped out of my integrity. Reset. Get freaking magical and jump back into Jess World. Jess World is kind of amazing… this time around, it started with a road trip. Time and space to reconnect. I’m still heavily swayed by proximity. Almost like a magnet, the closer I am to something, the stronger the pull in my heart. So time and space is essential for wellness. Thanks to my road trip, I started meeting some pretty amazing people. These are the people in my heart of hearts. These are the mirrors of what I encompass. These are the people that re-affirm that I’ve done the work and in a flow state. Granted, I visualise myself as a lighthouse. So with each boat that passes by, there are also some bugs. Each time a foggy energy presents itself, it’s an opportunity for me to lean into my intuition. Shut down the brain. Monitor the heart. Just follow the flow. Trust the gut. When I’m around aggressive (broken) energy, I still get an incredible sensation. It feels like I’m being punched in the face followed by a body roll of tingling energy. Not quite the chills. It’s darker. Familiar and slightly uncomfortable. Anyways, the last few days have been sensory overload that I couldn’t always tell what was MY energy vs what was coming from others. When I’m not grounded, I tend to absorb a lot from others.
Perhaps I’ll expand on a few of the epiphanies but for right now, it’s simply a moment to honour myself. Honouring that I’m able to stay relatively connected to self and detached from others. Honouring that my WHY is so incredibly strong that I continue to get affirmations from others that I’m on the right path. Honouring that I’m not where I want to be but I’m so incredibly blessed to be where I am.
Each person that I allow into my space is there because I enjoy them. Not because I need them but because I enjoy them. Such a beautiful space to be in. Knowing that I can lean on my community (if necessary) but also having the confidence that even if people don’t show up for me, I’ll continue to show up for myself.
Cheers to the people that offer a ladder when I jump down a rabbit hole. The people that laugh when I flip my switch. The community that preaches GET IT GIRL. GET IT. The family that is constantly expanding… Sports have been such a powerful part of my world and I’m embracing the Zumba family. The Sync family. And all the magical messengers in between.
The journey continues. With a full heart and a clear (ish) mind. The journey towards peace continues…
Health spot check (throwback): Resilience: The art of being a Lighthouse
#SelfCare #Resilience #Recovery #Trauma #Zumba #OneDayAtATime #BeYourOwnHero #GoalCrusher