I’m on another road trip! I love the hustle of the city. I loveeeeeee the open roads. For me, city life is still playing by the rules of ‘normal social constructs’. Deviating from these rules is not always received well… Sometimes I need to shrink myself to ‘fit in’. My magic is sometimes resisted… mostly embraced but sometimes, it’s resisted. June was such a massive month. August is going to be a massive month. So July is my self-care month. Let’s be honest, every day I have something related to self care but this month, I missed a few signs from the Universe and now I’m on a road trip… disconnect from society to reconnect with self.
Being on the open road reminds me that I have magic within. The saying, “your vibe attracts your tribe” is all that I need to remember. Whether it’s Shannon “Fertile Mertile” from Walmart, Charles from Tennessee Mountains or Michael from the Tennessee River or Jim from the Welcome Centre, I meet some of the warmest people in the world during roadtrips. The Universe is constantly blessing me with magic. Reminding me there is absolutely nothing wrong with me. I attract some amazing souls because I have magic within. After being in Chicago for too long, sometimes I forget the magic within…
I had 2 dog-sitting contracts for July. After completing the contracts, I decided to hit the road. A last hurrah road trip before embracing my next chapter as a Group Fitness Instructor. I’m so excited to be teaching Zumba, Strong, and lord knows what else I’ll get myself into. I’m OBSESSED with my gym and the people. They are so AWESOME! I am still digesting the fact that I’m a new instructor (for Zumba anyways) and secured a spot at a gym on MICHIGAN AVENUE. That’s kind of a big deal. It’s the main road in the entire city. People have been teaching for years and unable to secure a role on Michigan Ave… and here, I did it. I do not take this opportunity lightly. I am beyond blessed. To prepare for this next chapter, I decided to take a 3 week road trip. My soul needed time and space outside of the city to re-calibrate. What did I need to re-calibrate from… such a worthwhile question…
To start, I realised that I was surrounded by a bunch of disempowered people. People that were more comfortable with judging me than working on themselves. If they are judging me, they are not loving me. And at this point in my life, if you don’t love me, I have ZERO capacity for you. Full stop. People reminding me that family is family without accepting that my family has tried to kill me. People trying to get into my diary then cancelling last minute because they couldn’t manage their own diaries appropriately. Others telling me that a 3-week road trip is not responsible. A handful of people insisting that I need to sign a year lease rather than jump around month-to-month for housing. So much noise. So what’s in MY heart?!
Connected to Self
Well, my dog-walking/dog-sitting business is growing. I just secured another new client. I’m blessed. I secured 4 classes at a gym, with the intention to increase. I think I might be their dedicated STRONG by Zumba instructor and then also add STEP and Zumba Junior to the mix. I’m all about skilling up and this road trip is dedicated to expanding my Zumba skills. 2 more licenses by the end of the month! I’m blessed. I am in week 4 of my new coaching certification programme. I’ll be an ICF coach by December so that’s AWESOME. I’m blessed. Someone asked me to teach survival swim classes to children. At moment, I have zero time for their time management style but am giving them a chance to step into my world. I’m blessed. I have sooooo many wonderful things happening that I’m truly blessed. For real.
The Tug of War
Housing is not 100% stable. Mostly because I cannot make up my mind. I want to live near the lake but do I want to live with other people? Or by myself? What’s the process of applying for a studio? When do I get a credit card? Which credit card? Wouldn’t it just be easier to connect my Asian bankers with my USA bankers. Why do I have to put myself into debt to prove that I can pay my rent? Why don’t people accept 2-3 months upfront? I really should hire a lawyer to understand these 9 cards open/closed whilst I was living in Asia. I simply need to get super clear on my intentions and this will fix itself. I manifest like a pro… so it’s all about getting super clear on what I want. Easier said than done. I’m torn. 2 options. One is better for community, the other is better for peace. But if done properly, shouldn’t community and peace be the same? Do I trust the process? Is my faith bigger than my fear?
One of the last conversations in Chicago was with a Columbian. He took notice of the books in the trunk of my car. Our conversation danced around the Universe, religion, community and family. We also covered emotional processing and the importance to hold space for your own emotions. I was surprised when he asked me how I felt whilst talking to him. I said ‘peaceful’. He agreed and touched my heart by introducing 2 new things to me. Anthony De Mello’s book AWARENESS: CONVERSATIONS WITH THE MASTERS and Pantheism.
The next day, my sister-friend was reading DARING GREATLY by Brene Brown and brought this book to my consciousness. Another amazing soul. I LOVE when people make book recommendations.
I’m beyond blessed. I have a trunk full of books, a handful of friends, a full tank of gas, a cooler with some snacks… and a mind that continues to create magic. Leaving Chicago, I felt very disconnected but the reality of it all is… it was just another growth. Growth can feel chaotic…
The journey continues…